In any relationship, couples may occasionally hold fundamental differences on a particular issue due to their differing personalities, beliefs, or lifestyle needs. These issues can include matters such as tidiness, parenting, money, or sex. Gridlock can occur whenever the issue is raised, leading to no progress in resolving the dispute and adversely affecting the overall relationship.

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Consider the following points when these issues arise:

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• Acknowledge Universality: Remind yourself that every relationship has unresolved issues. If you were with a different partner, you might not experience the same issues, but you would encounter different ones.

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• Focus on Positives: Remind yourself of the positives about your partner and the relationship. Focusing only on unresolved issues will lead to a negatively skewed view of your relationship.

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• Engage in Dialogue: These issues should be openly discussed. Dialogue is crucial for understanding each other’s perspectives.

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• Accept Differences: Remember that your partner will not easily change their personality, beliefs, or lifestyle needs. Acceptance is key.

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• Approach with Gentleness: Approach the discussion with gentleness, respect, and understanding, aiming to move away from feelings of frustration and being stuck. While unresolved issues can negatively affect relationships, how the two partners respond to them has a much greater impact.

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• Seek Middle Ground: Get creative by seeking a middle ground, being flexible, and exploring compromises. Is there a solution that could partially satisfy both of you?

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• Take Time Out: If you sense anger or frustration building up, take some time out. Conflict resolution is challenging when emotions run high.

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• Evaluate Deal-Breakers: Decide if the problem is a deal-breaker. If it is a deal-breaker, then perhaps it is time to end the relationship and find a partner with whom the perpetual problems are not deal-breakers.

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• Respect Differences: If an agreement cannot be reached, conclude the discussion by expressing respect for their viewpoint while acknowledging your differing perspective.

 

Following these guidelines allows couples to manage perpetual unresolved issues more effectively, maintaining a healthier and more resilient relationship.

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Whatever the cause of your relationship challenges, the guidance and expertise of a trained counselling professional can help you significantly improve your situation and overall experience. Contact William Macaulay Counselling Perth today for more information or to book an appointment.